The Kansas City Royals had a bee infestation during their spring training game against the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim this past Sunday. Swarms of insects happening upon the innocent denizens of baseball is nothing new. The spring air opens up, winter shakes away and insects that have been hibernating for months now come out to join the party.
#RoyalsST is… buzzworthy. pic.twitter.com/L5ZzhHak83
— Kansas City Royals (@Royals) March 8, 2015
Many people may just see this as an innocent, humorous anecdote, but after reviewing the details, it appears this bee attack may be an act of subterfuge. Let’s review the facts:
FACT
There are no baseball teams named after insects, except for a couple of minor league teams, which would be the obvious choice for a bug attack.
FACT
There are three teams named after birds. Why the bird connection? Because of the birds and the bees, silly. Try to keep up. Those three teams are the St. Louis Cardinals, Toronto Blue Jays and Baltimore Orioles.
Bees like baseball, too. Who can blame them? #RoyalsST pic.twitter.com/8CFCJeNd8T
— Kansas City Royals (@Royals) March 8, 2015
FACT
We can discount the Cardinals, because sending a swarm of bees to your opponent is not “the right way” to win at baseball. We can also discount the Blue Jays, because polite Canadians would never try something so devious. But the Orioles? The Baltimore Orioles lost in the ALCS series against… you guessed it, The Kansas City Royals.
FACT
During that same ALCS series, Jeremy Guthrie (a former Oriole) wore this shirt to a press conference, taunting the Orioles team.
FACT
Orioles owner Peter Angelos looks like a bizzarro lord Sith. We’re not saying he’s behind the attack, but look into the dark eyes of this attorney for too long and you may find yourself in another realm of reality. Like Norfolk, Virginia.
FACT
The Orioles have had a very quiet offseason, despite being the reigning AL East champs. Which, of course, could all be a ploy as they wait in silence for the enemies to return.
FACT
Bees starts with the letter B, so does Baltimore.
Do we really need to say more? Wake up Sheeple! Or next time they might send in the dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark, they shoot bees at you! (RIP Sam Simon)